Only one half day left of my conference. I can hardly wait for this thing to be over and I can leave this town for a while. One amuse story to share. While I was in the men’s room today, I took my position at the urinal. As I was performing standard urinal procedure, I noticed out of the corner of my eye a man talking to another man about 5 urinals down. He stood right next to the man, and started talking while emptying the tank. It was obvious they had a solid business relationship. As they exchanged greetings the man in mid-pee reached over and shook the other man’s hand! 3 cardinal rules of standard men’s room procedure had been broken!
1. Failure to utilize the in-between urinal. If there is a bank of pee stalls, be kind and position yourself at LEAST one urinal from your fellow urines.
2. Direct Eye Contact. Never, I mean it never made eye contact with fellow urines. You have already established a male bond by proxy because you pee standing up. Eyes front, cowboy.
3. Hand to hand contact in mid procedure. NO! Should that man have put his had out in a kindly hand shaky gesture, I would have told him, (and you should too), “Sorry, sir, but round these parts we practice a little bit of hand sanitizing.
I hope this has been a valuable refresher course in men restroom behavior.
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